99 point 9
by I. Adler
Summary: Alex doesn't give it a second thought when her partner calls in sick, but Mike Logan certainly does. Reviews very welcome!
1. 99 point 9

**99.9**

Disclaimer: All characters, character names and all that jazz belong to Dick Wolf – well, except for the title, and that belongs to somebody else who's still not me.

The phone call had come in about an hour before work, so Alex knew she'd be on her own that day. No big deal, or hopefully not. All they had on the schedule was paperwork, and in the message he'd left, Goren had weakly assured her that it should only take him a day or two to get back on his feet. If anything major happened, she knew he'd drag himself in anyway; she'd give herself at least a couple days before actually worrying. She settled down with a stack of reports, and got down to business.

It seemed like only a few minutes went by, but when she looked up at the clock, she saw that four hours has passed since she'd arrived. A few feet away, Mike Logan stood up and stretched like he'd just been unchained from his chair.

"Hey, Eames, since you're on your own tonight, wanna grab a bite?" Logan snagged his coat and started to the door. Barek waited by the desk, purse in hand.

Alex looked at her desk, and saw the pile of paperwork had almost vanished. She hadn't realized how much work she could get done without distractions. "Sure, I'm about due for a break."

They headed down the street to the nearest diner. One look at the menu made her go for the coffee and Danish. At least that would be edible. Barek apparently agreed with her. Logan was made of sterner stuff, and ordered the burger special. "Girls. Always on a diet."

"Nice. You want to get remanded to sensitivity training?" Barek raised an eyebrow at her partner.

"Again? No prob – I've got the tests memorized."

"Quit flirting, you two. I swear, you're going to make me miss the big lunk." She looked at Logan's e-coli on a bun. "Besides, you chauvinist, eating like this is probably what got him. He sounded pretty rough on the phone."

Logan choked on his huge mouthful, while his partner looked embarrassed. "I'll bet he did," he managed to snicker.

"What?"

"Don't mind Mike. He's got some stupid theory, which he totally pulled out of his ass. Goren will be back to work tomorrow."

"He might not. He said he might be out for a couple of days." She didn't voice her worry that it might be mental health that was keeping her partner down. He'd seemed fine the last few days. Weeks, even.

"I knew it!" Logan's knowing smirk grew even wider, until Barek elbowed him.

"Look, Alex, I know this is none of my business, but are you and he…"

"What? NO! Ugh –it'd be like kissing your brother, your geeky, creepy brother! Trust me, that is _not_ an option!" She gave an involuntary shudder. "Why, do I look desperate?"

Barek looked relieved; Logan looked even more pleased with himself. "Sweetheart, you look fine to me. I've got a couple weekends free, myself."

"So I look downright frantic. Well, I'm not, but thanks for the offer. I'll wait until it's that or being a crazy cat lady."

"Suit yourself." He turned to his partner. "See? What'd I tell you? Who's the master detective?"

"Shut it, Logan. Just because you're a complete hound doesn't mean that everyone else is." Barek glanced over at Eames. "I was just worried that he may be right."

"Right about what? I'm not following you."

"And you call yourself a detective. So much for women's intuition." He leaned forward. "Look, he's been in a odd mood for a few weeks, right? Odd, but good."

"Goren's the king of odd."

"But this is different. He's also been coming and going right on time. And normally, he lives for the job. Early in, late leaving, like he goes home and just waits for the next day?"

"Yeah, usually, except for his poker nights."

"Which take place in the building, anyway. Did you know he missed the last one, and that he played like a chump the one before – like he wasn't there?"

"No, I didn't know that. He seemed like he was in a hurry to get to the last one."

"Nope. Not there. That wouldn't be so incriminating, but he's been on the phone out by the smoking area. Now, why would he go all the way outside to make a call, when he could have the luxury of sitting inside? And more than that, he wasn't paying too much attention to who was around him. I watched him instead of the pigeons, and that was a personal call."

"You eavesdropped? What'd you hear?  
"What do you take me for? I was back by the wall – but I could see his face. I've only seen the guy that pleased with himself when he's hot on the trail or busted a case, and if that were going on, you'd know."

"That's true. So what are you getting at?"

"I'm saying your partner has come down with a bad case of company."

Alex gagged on her coffee. "You're joking! This is Robert Goren we're talking about, right? You're saying that he skipped work to, to…"

"Got it in one." Logan settled back in his seat.

"He couldn't…I mean, he could. Oh, my god. No, no way." Alex looked at her cell phone. "No, he really sounded sick. He's probably been coming down with something." It was Logan's turn to choke on a mouthful.

Barek punched his arm. "Cut it out. You're about thirty years too late for that kind of crap."

"All I'm saying is it's possible. Look, I've got an idea. When we get back to the office, we'll call. We'll put him on speakerphone, and if he's really sick, we'll be able to tell."

"That's low, even for you."

"Like my old partner, Lenny Briscoe, used to say, you get sloppy, you get caught. It's not like I never got a well-timed call from work on my sick days." He rubbed his hands together in anticipation. "If I'm wrong, that's it. But if I'm right, that's where the fun starts."

Returning to the office, they grouped around the empty desk. Logan plopped down in Goren's chair, enjoying himself far too much. "Ok, go ahead and call. He'll sound distracted or tired - "

"Like he was actually sick?"

"Almost, but not quite. So go ahead and ask him how he feels. Be specific, ask for symptoms."

She dialed Goren's number. One ring, two…on the third, he picked up.

"Hello?" He definitely sounded groggy, like he'd just woken.

"Bobby? It's Alex. Sorry to bug you, but we were worried."

"Um, that's, that's fine."

"Is it the flu? Logan says there's a flu going around. Did you get a shot?"

"Uh, no, I, no. Maybe."

Logan scribbled a note: _Put him on hold_.

"I wanted to ask…shoot, can you hang on?" She pressed the hold, and said, "So?"

"Ok, now switch him back on, fast."

The speakerphone crackled back on, and they caught the end of a few words, a bit too low to hear. He was talking to someone else. Alex's eyes bugged, but she caught herself. "Are you there?"

"Uh, sort of."

"Well, if you're sure you're doing ok, I'd better go." Logan waved another note. "Do you want me to stop by, get you something?"

"No, no, I'm fine. I just need to…stay in bed for a while." The three detectives exchanged horrified glances.

Logan leaned over to the phone. "Hey, big guy. We're just checking in. Wanted to make sure you hadn't caught something that was, you know, going around. Have you had problems keeping stuff down?" Alex was sure Goren could hear her choke over the line.

He made some sort of strangled noise, and there was a pause. "You know what, Mike? You're right. I haven't been keeping anything down at all. I have no idea what's wrong. Every hour or so, it just comes up, again and again. What do you suggest? Or has it been a while since you've had this sort of problem?"

"Gee, Bobby, I usually use one of those oral thingys. You know, pop it in there, check your temperature… Maybe rub some Vicks on your chest…"

"That's a thought. Whoops, gotta run. Thanks for calling." He sounded markedly better. Alex could swear she heard him mutter "asshole" before he hung up.

Barek looked shocked, then said, "I think he's pissed."

Logan burst into laughter. Alex barely managed to suppress hers. Once she regained control, she leaned over to him. "Thanks. I have to deal with him when he gets back, you know."

"Hey, we could do him one better. We could wait ten minutes, call back, tape it and have the guys down in the lab enhance the background noise. He should be "recovered" by then"

"No. I do NOT want to hear that."

He grabbed the phone on Goren's desk. "I've got an idea. I'm gonna call Munch at SVU, tell him to call and say they got a complaint about something unusual going on."

"Are you sure you're not twelve?" Barek sighed. "I'm going to go back to work. You know, that stuff we get paid to do?"

"Speak for yourself, I'm getting paid no matter what," Logan called after her.

"Get out of here, Mike. Go harass my partner from your own desk."

"Please don't ever say "ass" in conjunction with him again. It wasn't until now that my tender mind was sullied with that ugly image."

At that, Alex whacked him with a stack of papers and he retreated, too. She sat down and stared at the empty desk across from her, shook her head and got back to work.


	2. Do You Have a Little Time

Alex straightened the last papers into a neat pile on her desk. Day two without Bobby Goren had passed uneventfully. At least he'd be back in the next day, and if nothing else, the fallout from Logan's prank would be amusing.

As she walked out of One Police Plaza, past the area where the smokers congregated, she heard someone calling her name.

"Eames! Wait up." Mike Logan trotted over to her, fresh from his post-work cancer break. "Taking off?"

"You really are the world's greatest detective, Mike. What tipped you off – the purse, the coat, the fact that it's past six…"

"I'll never reveal my methods, " he grinned. "So, I thought to myself, there goes Alex Eames. She looks tired, she looks bored, she looks hungry. I could help with all three."

"And what would you get out of this?" She looked at him skeptically. He was being far too cocky to be asking for a date.

"A charming companion? A decent meal? Some fascinating conversation? A ride home?" He bounced on his heels, waiting for an answer. Something was definitely up.

"So, you're asking me out to save subway fare? Somehow, that doesn't add up either." She pulled out her car keys. "Level with me, and I'll think about it. You've got thirty seconds."

"All right, you got me - I have a horrible ulterior motive. I couldn't possibly want to buy a good-looking lady dinner." She didn't even dignify that with a reply. "Okay, okay. I do need your help with something, but we can discuss it over food, and I'll pay. I assure you, you'll be entertained. And if you wanna call it a date, that's fine by me."

She made a quick mental chart of the stupidest things she'd ever done, and figured a quick rating for the possible outcome of the evening on it. Logan, for all his faults was a cop – it couldn't possibly land in the top five. "I'll hear you out. But it's not a date, I'm getting a drink and a dessert and you're leaving a good tip."

"Ow. I may be many things, but I'm not cheap. Easy, yes, but never cheap. Well, almost never."

"Do you have somewhere in mind, or am I choosing the restaurant?"

"That's part of the plan. Let's get going, and I'll explain on the way."

As they walked to the car, Logan made small talk about the paperwork she'd been doing, commiserating about the petty hassles of handling the gruntwork. He and Barek were apparently still trying to negotiate who did what. "But, you know, that's how it goes with a partner. You've gotta draw lines, and respect them."

Alex unlocked the doors, and he clambered into the passenger seat. Turning to her, he said, "Here's the deal. I choose the neighborhood, you pick the place."

"That seems random."

"Far from it. But try to get in the spirit of the adventure."

"Whatever. Which way do we go?"

"I'm thinking Brooklyn, out around Williamsburg. "

That caught her off guard, since she thought he lived near Staten Island. Bobby was the one who lived out in that direction. "You want to go to Brooklyn? Why the hell…oh, no. Tell me this isn't about yesterday."

"Now you're thinking."

"How long can you play the same joke?"

"Until I quit laughing." He wriggled his eyebrows, then abruptly became more serious. "Besides, it goes back to what I said about respecting lines. Your partner should re-draw his."

"And we'll make him do that by stepping all over the ones we've got."

"Yeah, we will. He's part of the squad, but he's too damn aloof. You remember when you were in school, that one kid all the teachers loved? Nobody played with that kid."

"Oh, and you did?" She bristled a little, partly in defense of Goren, partly in discomfort from some old memories.

"Me? Nah. But it's never too late to change." He shrugged. "Maybe it's a guy thing. I've been here, what, five months? I talk to the people around the office; I see how everyone goes around him, instead of including him. Man, do people think he's a geek. They respect him, but they avoid him."

"No they don't. What about his poker game?"

"I hate to break it to you, but, well, have you ever gone?"

"Eh, I don't do cards."

"It's geek central. They invited Carver, for god's sake. It's all techs, docs and specialists. Everybody there has some kind of academic system for playing, like it's a math problem instead of a game."

She laughed. "You lost big, didn't you?"

"You should learn to have faith in me. It was a carefully planned investment. I wasn't about to hand Bobby Goren and his people-profiling tricks any serious bank. I said he was a geek – I didn't say he wasn't brilliant at it."

"So you think a little ribbing should make him feel like one of the guys. Like he gets included."

"Exactly. I'm helping him, if you think about it. Nothing wrong with a little friendly joking – it proves you have friends."

Alex made a derisive snort. "Friends like you…"

"And you. Although it's funny, because you'd think your friends would know about what you had going on. You wouldn't, say, hide your phone calls, or lie about skipping work. Look, Eames, are you gonna let him get away with sneaking off like this? I mean, did you even know he was seeing anyone?" When she didn't answer, he pressed on. "It has to have been going on for at least three weeks by my calculations. He's being a slippery bastard about it. If he's going to go to the trouble of covering his tracks – even as poorly as he has – I wanna know why. And so do you."

That was the problem with hanging out with detectives – they homed in your motives too easily. Two could play at that game, though. "And, of course, this is a form of juvenile competition for you – you want to prove that you're working on his level. If you can catch him, you're scoring points off him in some weird little mystery game."

"_We're_ scoring points. I think Bobby-boy underestimates some of the people he works with. He's good, really good, but so are we. We're not just spectators at the Goren show."

"So you want me to spy on my partner, possibly embarrass the crap out of him, definitely violate his privacy, just to say nyah, nyah, nyah, I'm smarter than you? Jeezus, Mike." She started the car. "I'm in."

"Alex, I think I love you."

"I'm getting two desserts."


	3. People are Strange

When they reached Bobby's neighborhood, Alex slowed the car down. "Now what?"

Logan checked his watch. "This is good. We're going to drive past his house, see whether there're lights on, or what."

"It's up on the left. Watch the second floor."

"Got it. Yeah, there's no sign of life. Good. We're gonna catch him there."

"Where?"

"That's what I need you to tell me. You've driven him home before, right?"

"A bunch of times. You know, I've never actually seen him drive." She followed Logan's train of thought. "I get it. You think he's headed for one of his usual haunts. Risky."

"Nah, it's day two. It's a perfectly reasonable time to go to one of your favorite low-key places, nothing too expensive, and nothing experimental or trendy. That way, you get a feel for whether she's going to be high-maintenance or not."

"Barek's right. You are a pig."

"We all are, and you all know it. So, where would he go? He's in a good mood, probably pretty hungry, too."

"Well, I can remember at least three different places we've gone to. I think the bar is out. Maybe the Mexican place he wanted to try…no, wait. I've got it. It's the Italian place. When in doubt, head for mommy's cooking." She shook her head in disgust.

Logan perked up. "Great! I could really go for some osso bucco. Even if I'm wrong – which I'm not – we still win."

"I'm afraid you've got a couple of problems, there. First off, there's next to no way we can sit in there without being spotted. And secondly, you're not getting osso bucco – it's the wrong region of Italy. Most of the places around here do southern Italian, like Sicilian. Osso bucco's a Milanese specialty, and that's up in Lombardy."

"Oh, yeah? Thanks for the geography lesson, Bobby." He rolled his eyes.

She just smiled. "You're the one bragging about how observant you are. How you can live in this city and not learn about food is beyond me."

"I eat it, I don't research it. As for the other thing, I do have a backup plan. You'll have to make do with takeout, though, if we can get that without being seen. You mind?"

"You don't stay a cop long if you don't like eating in cars. I'm still getting a cannoli, and you can owe me the drink."

"You're on." If she didn't know better, she'd swear he was flirting.

They parked and made their way over to the small restaurant. Logan sized it up as they approached. "Oh, this is good. Casual, but not too casual." He turned to her. "Why do women take pizza on the day after as a personal insult?"

"Because you're either saying you're cheap or we are." She checked the foyer through the window. "If he's here, he's already in."

"After you." He held the door open, then followed her inside.

They were met by a young waitress, who picked up a pair of menus. "Good evening. Two for dinner?"

Logan stepped forward, ducking to get closer to the server, and dropped his voice. "Sort of, but we have a problem. We think a friend of ours is here…"

"Oh, and you want to join their table?" The girl smiled, looking expectantly at each of them.

"No!" Eames blurted. "I mean…"

"She means it's kind of the opposite problem." Logan shot her a meaningful look.

Alex groaned to herself, but played along. "We'd rather our friend not know we were here. It's like a surprise."

The waitress looked confused for a moment, then widened her eyes. "Oh. I get it." She began looking into the seating area, joining the conspiracy. "What does your friend look like?"

"He's a big guy, not fat, big, taller than me, comes in here a lot…" Logan began.

A sharp squeal from the girl cut him off. "Ohmigawd! That guy?" She turned to Alex "I _thought_ you looked familiar. Hey, did he _dump_ you?"

"No, I…" Alex tried to interrupt, but the girl was caught up in her scenario.

"What a rat! He's in there, all right," she growled. "And I thought he was _nice_! My ex did the same thing to me!" Logan gave Alex a helpless shrug as the waitress continued. "Are you sure you wanna sneak around and not get in his face? I say go for it - just go on and dump a bowl of alfredo on the bum and his little miss tits! Show him you got a new guy – you're not her brother are you? Good! You got a better guy, and… "

Eames had to do something. "Actually, she's my sister. I'm checking up on her, not him."

That stopped the tirade dead. "Oh, um, I…"

"It's okay. He's my assistant, and I asked him to take her out. I just wanted to see how they were getting along." She gave a sympathetic smile, and the waitress's horrified expression softened a little.

Logan slung his arm around Alex's shoulders. "See, honey, I knew you were being silly. She's a little overprotective, " he added. After digging in his pocket, he extended his hand towards the girl. "We just want to pop in, get something to go, and maybe see how it's going. No big deal."

The girl looked down, then took something out of his hand and brightened visibly. "Ok, they'll get your order in the bar. I'll let you know when you can peek in."

Logan kept his arm where it was as they walked away from the dining area. Alex took advantage of his proximity to hiss, "Honey? That's going to cost you."

"Not if you don't want your 'assistant' to hear about his job title, _sis_."

"Hey, I _am_ the senior partner, you know. Technically…"

"Whatever. Nice save, by the way. Between that and the twenty I slipped her, I think we're good."

"As long as we don't get spotted and you don't try anything else cute."

He grinned at her, and slipped his arm away. "Aw, sweetie, I'm just trying to reassure you. Just because you're not 'miss tits' doesn't mean you don't have your charms."

Alex got in a quick elbow to his midsection as he drew away. He was still smiling as he pulled out a bar stool for her. He handed over a credit card, snapped out his order, and turned back to her. "I'm gonna run out for a second. Can you hold down the fort?"

"Sure. Grab a bottle of water for me while you're polluting your lungs." She reached for her purse, but he left before she could offer him any cash.

She was debating getting a glass of marsala while she waited, which would let Logan off the hook for the other dessert and the drink, when the waitress came back.

"Sorry it's taking awhile. They're really wrapped up in it, all talking, no eating. If it helps, I think she's having a good time. I tried to take their orders, but he was telling her some gross story about an octopus or somethin', and I thought she was gonna pee from laughing."

"Ew. I've heard that one, I think. Crawls up your nose, right?"

The girl wrinkled her own nose in sympathy. "That's the one. Complete with hand gestures. Don't take this the wrong way, but your sister's kinda weird."

"Family. What can you do?"

"Yeah, but you might want to hook her up with somebody more normal next time, if it's not too late. Maybe help her shop, too. You have great shoes."

Great, she had a new best friend. "Thanks. Too late, you said?"

Nodding, the waitress gestured out towards the dining room. "Uh-huh. Are you sure you don't wanna interrupt them? I was gonna say you could catch her in the ladies', or while he left, but they're not moving."

"No, I better not." Then curiosity got the better of her. "Just show me where they are, and I'll look really quickly."

"Ok, c'mon." Alex followed the girl to the edge of the doorway. "If you look from here, he can't see you. If you want hide from her, I can take you around…"

"No, this is fine." It wasn't really. Bobby's back managed to block her view pretty effectively, so all she could get a good look at was what seemed to be the edge of a long purple skirt. Angling for a better view would mean she'd run the risk of being seen herself. If body language was any clue, though, the waitress was right. He did seem to be having a good time, and she could hear them both laughing.

She retreated to the bar to wait for Logan and the food. Luckily, both appeared relatively quickly.

He had a brown paper sack under one arm, and seemed ready to go. "Any developments?"

Alex described her failed attempt, then added, "I don't think we're going to be able to get a good look at all."

"Sure we will, just not here. Like I said, I have a backup plan." He patted the bag. "We're set. If you grab the food, we can motor."

"Or at least idle elsewhere."

"You get the picture. After you."


End file.
